Day 25 (10.07.16) How a broken washing machine can help differentiate acquaintance, friends and partners

Your machine broke…

 

No it is not good at all!! But just imagine how they would response to such honest answer lol.  

Good thing you can rant about it with friends 


And beg your good friend to let you use his washing machine until you get a new one. Of course, he is close enough to give you a truthful reaction.

 

Meanwhile, your close friends would have no problem with asking for some return for you to use her washer.
  

And for your Western style partner, financial commitment should be equal between the two of you. So you will own 1/2 of a washing machine, while he owns the other half. (cool style!)

  

But if it was in Asia, the partner/husband would have to take the full blow. Yes, it is the norm!!! The in-laws pretty much expect it from the guy. Although in the current modern societies, not all men would silently accept such expectations.

  

Athough, ultimately, girls just want the guy surprises her with a new washing machine!!! And maybe something extra for special kisses :**** . 
  
 

Day 24 (09.07.16) – Fox it up.

  
This is the 13th attempt. To be come good at anything requires practice. Today is my pencil practice on Fox. Why? Because I have never drawn fox before and I need to prepare myself for an illustration promise to come.

Genius: 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration.

Thomas Edison.
<<now that is a cheesy quote>>

Day 20 – Angel under shooting stars

Day 20 - For MF 2.png

 

We lost one of our dear friends about 6 months ago for cancer…ย I think she has been the ultimate source of inspiration for many of us. I will forever remember the encouraging words she wrote for herself during that time.

I appreciate these days of sickness. Because, thanks to them, I was able to fully absorb the value of life. To be allowed to live is already happiness, to be loved is truly wonderful. To be allowed to desperately fight, stealing back your own life, is the ultimate challenge that will turn the courageous humans into powerful gladiators.

Many won’t be lucky enough to surpass and win, but they have lived fully without a regret. Many will be strong and lucky enough to triumph this battle. Then, I doubt there could be a single thing in this life that could defeat them!!…. Each new day is a happy day, don’t do anything that we will later regret…

This image is made for everyone who has lost someone. I was a lucky one, who has always been so far away that it is much easier to recover from grief. However, I know the scar that her absence has left on others will probably never fade…

From those wounds you left, scars grow…

They will never fade, don’t you know?

They are just forever hiding in our hearts,

One painful stab of memories,

And we’re back to the start…

But in your love, we will triumph that pain,

Because truly, there is nothing there to gain…

From pondering pains and regrets,

All I want to say is: “Lest We Forget…”

Painting and poem by Lainyย 

 

Sincerest thanks to Sketchy_stories (a poet in Instagram for his inspiring poem on scars.

 

Reflection on an old drawing

Whenever I take a look at this drawing, I am flooded with memories, darkness, and happiness.

I drew this at the end of my depressive episode. That was when I felt isolated, my self-esteem was shattered, and I was constantly reaching for my phone, browsing internet to kill time. Mind you, I was, concurrently, a high achiever, cheerful colleague and student who have never missed a deadline. But in the background, it was such a dark moment when everything seemed right, but nothing felt right. 

While work wasn’t a big problem thanks to dead lines and external expectation; achieving any personal goal was such a chore…. “why should i do it?”, “I won’t amount to anything anyway”, “How could I reach the same awesomeness level as those artists??”, “I am a failure.”, “Let’s just kill time…”… And it went on, and on, and on…

As I struggle to get out, I came to realise this trio: self-esteem, laziness and distraction, were what holding myself and many of us back from improving ourselves.

Then I said “F*** it! I can’t stand this anymore. Why should I waste time this way. This is NOT ME!” … And with my partner 1000% support, I finished my semester, I completed 100km hike in 37 hours to raise money fighting poverty, I went back home with mom, I read whatever I like, I caught up with my old mates, I got a new job, I continued new semester, I hiked to Everest Base Camp. And everything was a tiny evidence that I can do it!! Everything was lessons that taught me how to listen to myself. What make me feel fed up? what make me feel amazing? Who was good for me? Who was not? what moves my heart? who do i admire? All so that i could adjust my action and pathway, maybe very slowly, 1 degree angle at a time. 

And then, out of an act to improve myself, and to respond to the warm fuzzy feelings I have everytime I press my pens again the paper, Lainy’s creation was borned. Halleluya! The last 18 days were filled with joy! And stress, but mostly joy haha.

Distraction is still there, so is laziness and low self-esteem. But hey, it is nowhere as bad as it was. So, BIG GIANT GRIN ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜. 

Watch me, Life! 

If you want change, change yourself. When you change yourself, things will change themselves for you.

ENOUGH is ENOUGH!!

Make a resolve is to promise yourself that you will never give up!!!

Quote from self-help seminar on youtube


With all that said, this is how this old drawing is today.